Who do you want to be in 2017?

The start of a new year is always full of possibilities and what may be’s and wishes for the future. No wonder it’s a time for resolutions as people are facing 365 blank slate days in front of them, to fill with hopes and dreams of who they want to be in the future.

I’m not so crash hot with New Year resolutions. I tend to be a start it now person, not a wait until a specific date. I grew up living with my Mum and Grandma and one of the most common thing I remember both of them saying was “On Monday, I’ll start X” (normally X was a diet but it did apply to everything else) and I would always wonder why Monday? Why not now?.  So me and New Year Resolutions are a bit like that, why wait until a new year, why not now?

But.. it’s traditional to have resolutions, and I’m a sucker for traditions. Mostly because traditions are routines (long-term routines) and I like the idea of routines (sticking to routines is a lot harder, but I do like the idea of them). So here’s my wish-list for the new year:

1

I would like to be a happier person. I’m fairly sure I do a really good job of appearing eternally happy, you need to be a really close friend to know that I’m not. I just find it easier to be happy around people because it sparks a lot fewer questions than talking about your inner demons, and how freaking hard it is to be here every single day, and black clouds and such what nots. But I’d really like for that to stop being an act and actually take over enough to push out all the crap inside.

2

I want to get back into running. 2016 was a year full of running, right up until I finished the half marathon in October, since then I think I’ve gone out for a run maybe 3 times.  My run tracker shows me that I logged 621km of runs in 2016. I did have a personal challenge set of 1000km for the year, so obviously I’m about 379km short of that. This year I’d like to try to hit that 1000km, or at least better what I did last year. I don’t know if I’ll sign up for another 1/2 marathon, while I love running, the really long distance training runs were bloody horrible. I’ve worked out I enjoy runs up to about 10km in one go, it’s long enough to get into a nice groove and start to enjoy the run and you have lots of time to think about things but after that, it just gets painful and long and dare I say it.. a little boring tbh.

3

I want to start having a pc free night, once a week is too much, maybe once a fortnight. I love gaming, and I love WoW in particular but I don’t read, or watch movies or craft or do anything else if I’m on the pc every night. Sometimes I wonder if part of 1 is because as much as I’d hate to think about it, my online life is not real and maybe it’s not as fulfilling as being able to touch and feel something tangible. But even just thinking about a full night not at my pc is enough to make me feel uncomfortable. Pretty sure that shouldn’t be a thing.

4

And then there’s all the little things that flutter through my head, I want to get more into minimalism as a way of life, I love the idea of less is more, though anyone who’s seen my shoe collection wouldn’t believe that’s true. I don’t deal with change well and learning that nothing in life is permanent is a big thing for me as well as accepting I can’t plan for everything, there’s weekly Buddhism workshops not to far from here, I’d really like to make these a thing in my life too as I think the teachings from there would help with the change/plan thing.

5.

Be more like Z. As a pure indication of how much WoW crosses into my real life, I think about my character a lot when I’m faced with my rather regular bouts of anxiety over not being enough. In my mind, she’s this strong fierce troll who can face down anything that comes her way. I love the photo below of her fearless and undaunted and able to conquer anything. I need to channel my inner Zee in 2017.

cropped-september.jpg

 

 

Do you have resolutions/wish lists/goals for the coming year?

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